Credit: u/manchesterMan0098

  • Korhaka@sopuli.xyz
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    7 days ago

    All the battles you fought that day? Unless you are on the front line in Ukraine you should be able to find a more chill lifestyle.

    • Dunbar@lemm.ee
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      7 days ago

      Yeah this is something I’ve been trying to walk the talk about.

      I joined an adults sports league and have a few friends I call almost daily on rotation (whether they want it or not lol) and I’ve started feeling a lot more fulfilled and less anxious.

      Most of those friends expect my calls now, and I get questioned if I can’t make it to a practice or game. It feels good to have your presence desired, whether it’s in a romantic or platonic relationship. There’s an epidemic of men who think that that void can only be filled with a lover.

    • Letsdothisok@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      “Stop expecting women to do all the work.” All the work?

      So men should be expected to do the (actual) work and the emotional work?

      So what good are women? Baby ovens?

  • slumlordthanatos@lemmy.world
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    7 days ago

    ¿Por qué no los dos?

    Someone who would lay down in bed with me and hold me while I cry would be a tremendous help to my mental health, but a therapist would be real nice, too. Too bad it’s a five-month wait to get in to see one around here.

  • Mallspice@lemm.ee
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    7 days ago

    Yes but also definitely no.

    I’ve been to therapy and no amount of conversation or drugs can replace genuine intimacy and a lot of single men would have their mental health improved more by an escort than a therapist.

    • peaches@lemm.ee
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      7 days ago

      It’s a shame that in some cultures simple friendships men, women, mixed are not accompanied by physical touch too, like a hug. And also being able to talk openly about the struggles, like us women do with our friends. You get a lot from a friend’s hug or them listening to you.

      • Mallspice@lemm.ee
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        7 days ago

        Yes. It’s not just sexual it’s about being close and open to people. I brought up escorts, and not hookers, because a lot of escorts do emotional support for their clients too in a way a therapist can’t. Good emotional support, from anywhere, can be worth more than therapy and unlike therapy there’s no paper trail insurance or govs can use against you.

        Therapy is good if you think you have a condition and need a diagnosis and recommendation for a medication. That and dealing with trauma if you can’t handle it on your own. Otherwise it’s smarter to avoid it, use friends for support, and do your own research (assuming you know how to research better than a maga).

    • meliaesc@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      Endorphins from sex are absolutely not a long term mental health treatment. It might improve your mood at that moment, but not your health.

      • Mallspice@lemm.ee
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        7 days ago

        Is it a cure? No, but it’s usually a better treatment than what therapy offers, mental health requires constant maintenance, and in a lot of ways it’s smarter to keep your mental conditions off of a record authoritarians can use against you.

        Not to mention I’ve seen people create more problems for themselves by focusing on them too much. Too much therapy is worse than too little.

      • Mallspice@lemm.ee
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        6 days ago

        Maybe if people didn’t go out of their way to say shit like this, missing my point and insulting me without reading the rest of thread, then men would respect women more and there’d be fewer misogynists. But no. You did. Congrats. I suggest you change your ways before you inadvertently spread misogynism with your feminism like I’m guessing you’ve done before.

  • Vreyan31@reddthat.com
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    6 days ago

    To all those saying, “but why shouldn’t men want to be cared for?”

    This meme plays into a narrative the makes women subservient.

    It suggests that only men “battle”, and that being a man and “battling” entities them to care by women.

    No where in this is acknowledgement that women have burdens too, and that all people benefit from care.

    No where in this is any hint of reciprocity. If anything, it implies that the “joy” of taking care of “her man” should be enough.

    No. Walk the fuck on. Having a penis doesn’t entitle you to one-sided care.

    The other thing implied by this - that women should ‘naturally’ be able to fix ‘her man’. But if a woman in broken? Oof - ‘she has Daddy issues’ and better fix herself, right?

    And what if a woman tries to fix ‘her man’ and fails? Oh look - isnt that convenient - society just took all his faults and made them her failures. Wow! Who wouldn’t want to sign up for that??

    And just look at that success rate. You can count up the number of women killed by intimate partners and see how great this plan is.

    Society really needs to get past this childish narrative that tells men they should expect to find a manic pixie dream girl who lives only to make him happy. Men make fun of girls for believing in Prince Charming, but this is truly the more destructive fairy tale.

  • Pacattack57@lemmy.world
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    6 days ago

    I get that the original was a bit sensationalist but I don’t see a problem with the overall message. Yes it was needlessly gendered but again that doesn’t change the message.

    People need people that care about them and will listen. That’s it.

    • Damaskox@lemmy.world
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      7 days ago

      There should be options - crisis numbers and volunteer work around it. For free.

      You can find some help over using a search engine 💪

  • rekabis@programming.dev
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    6 days ago

    I would say that, conditional to the man having a partner, intimacy is a hell of a lot more accessible than therapy. Provided that intimacy is not rationed or made conditional, this could provide more lasting and more timely healing than therapy as well.

    With that said, we really need to normalize men seeking therapy. There are far too many men where the conditions above are not met, and so could and would benefit more from therapy than intimacy.

    • JadenSmith@sh.itjust.works
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      8 days ago

      It definitely does not need to be one or the other. Oftentimes therapy could help in the relationship department considerably. Deep hurt is hard to get through alone, yet I hope more and more people understand there is help out there.
      If relationships are a two way street, and one person is hurting enough to affect their role within it all there should be no shame in reaching out in that way. It could help a lot. It’s a shame there’s still so much stigma around therapy.

      • Zorsith@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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        8 days ago

        I dont think that stigma is going to get any better any time soon (at least in the US). The past year has given me significantly less trust that anything medical remains private; i have no trust that things said in confidence will not be weaponized against me by the current government. There have already been cases of states demanding medical records for pregnancy, abortion, and transgender records, and texas actually got their hands on some records IIRC.

        • littlewonder@lemmy.world
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          8 days ago

          My therapist says she takes a bare minimum of notes because she understands the fear people have of private info getting leaked. Maybe someone worried about that could ask about their notes process during the therapist-finding stage.

    • the_q@lemm.ee
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      8 days ago

      Wait wait wait… You’re telling me people need love? Pfft I don’t believe it.

    • homoludens@feddit.org
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      8 days ago

      I don’t think the OP in the screenshot is describing a loving partnership though - the emotional support described is very much one sided.

  • alecbowles@lemm.ee
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    8 days ago

    I’m a man and I just need a big hairy and muscular chest to lay my head on the end of a very tough day.

    I have no idea what this guy Alex is on about.