• barnaclebutt@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    But, you don’t understand the toilet. The toilet cannot be monetized if we cannot see you taking a poo. Changing the glass doors will completely kill a trillion dollar industry.

  • niktemadur@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    By using this toilet you “agree” consent to our updated reams of legal mumbo jumbo designed to overwhelm you, and which chips away at your rights and hands them over to us.

    If you click “disagree”, you are free to have your gallbladder feel as if it is going to burst, which may cause internal damage that is NOT our responsibility.

    This restroom service has been brought to you by the techbro suits eyeing that new Learjet for unlimited weekend cocaine-and-hookers trips to Vegas and the Caribbean.

    • AwkwardLookMonkeyPuppet@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      If you click “disagree”, we will immediately close this app, and issue no refunds. If agreement is optional then we will ask you again every four minutes for eternity, or until you consent, whichever comes first.

      • rotten@lemm.ee
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        1 month ago

        > then we will ask you again every four minutes for eternity

        That’s why god made ublock origin.

    • Agent641@lemmy.world
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      1 month ago

      They install cameras and sell the feed access to the highest bidder.

      They force you to watch a 30 second ad for each wad of toilet paper used

      You can pee for free, but pooing requires you to sign up with your email address and credit card.

      You get regular notifications informing which of your friends are pooing nearby.

      Invite 3 friends to get 1 month premium pooing for free.

      Get an ultra yearly subscription and you get a frosted glass cubicle for enhanced privacy (camera feed remains in cubicle)

  • pemptago@lemmy.ml
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    1 month ago

    Logs your usage, lets you see one week of history. Meanwhile sells the entire usage history of you and everyone in your contact list to anyone willing to pay.

    Clients try to get you to pay as much as possible for toilet paper (subscription tp anyone? Will be cheaper in first stage of enshittification until they monopolize the market). Other clients try to correlate the success of political propaganda with how regular you are. Elected officials won’t regulate, because it’s a tool they had to master to get elected.

    On the plus side, Lemmy exists and that’s a step in the right direction. Would work that into toilet metaphor but don’t wanna ramble.

  • klemptor@startrek.website
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    1 month ago

    Oh man there is (or was, I’m too lazy to check) a restaurant in Philly that had walls that were transparent when you were outside the bathroom but when you locked the door became opaque from the outside but were still transparent from the inside and it was WEIRD pissing in there. Paranoia to the max

    • tetris11@lemmy.ml
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      1 month ago

      Bulldoze the community garden and replace it with glass
      This is my sermon
      This is my sermon
      This is my sermon

  • danc4498@lemmy.world
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    1 month ago

    This one of those fancy glasses that is no longer see through once you lock the door? That would be a genius way of telling which toilets are empty.