cross-posted from: https://hexbear.net/post/9725244
There’s just something like, idk, “off” about these movies. Like they were made by committee or something and they are checking off a list: action scene here, now a break with soy banter, AUDIENCE LAUGH, now have spider-man holding cap’s shield, check, POST CREDITS EASTER EGG SET UP FOR NEXT ASSEMBLY LINE MOVIE
Man it just sucks. I thought to myself, well you like the 80’s marvel cheese in your silly comics books so surly you’ve jive with this, right? No, it just exists to piss me off.
It’s the same formula I didn’t like about the D&D movie. If you told me these were being made by AI I’d be like, yeah that’s believable.
Am I being a film snob??
Aaron Good I think it was said it a couple days ago, but the movie is literally just a metaphor for the liberal guilt over the “necessary evil of empire.”
Tony Stark is like "Oh no, these unaccountable violence machines are doing real harm and need to be held accountable. What’s that? Oh, it might be necessary for the violence machines to be unaccountable in order to maintain the current status quo? I better let these TRAITOROUS VIOLENT VIGILANTES CAUSING REAL HARM TO CIVILIAN POPULATIONS PER THE TEXT OF THE FILM just run free while I look into the camera shaking my head to tell the audience I disapprove.
It STINKS. to quote
And then Thandos comes along with the snappening and everyone gets to conveniently forget about all that navel gazing because we need to band together to defeat Purple Man bad.
Thunderbolts was almost worse with the whole CIA thing.
E) i almost forgot, and now at this point in the broader narrative Tony Stark is dead and his soul is currently being tortured in The Metaverse™ brought to you by Meta, so conveniently we don’t have to ask ourselves difficult questions like that anymore. Instead we can just ask StAIrk “Is this true?” and move on to whatever the next Purple Man Bad is.
E2) oh rite, the next bad guy is green tony stark
Nah someone showed me a clip of the avengers movie where they all get in a circle and look tough for 20 seconds while the camera rotates and I couldn’t keep from laughing because it looked so goofy.
Like it was so… forced? “LOOK AT THESE SERIOUS TOUGH GUYS STANDING IN THEIR BRIGHTLY COLORED MATKETABLE COSTUMES. THEYRE SO TOUGH. THESE ARE THE GOOD GUYS LOOK AT THEM. AHHHH THEYRE BREATHING SO HARD AND GRITTING THEIR TEETH!!!”
Just have them punch stuff or whatever I’m not going go “woagh so epic” because you bought a camera dolly chill.
I haven’t seen any Marvel movies since Avengers, but I did start watching Moon Knight, and I kinda liked the D&D movie with Captain Kirk from a couple years ago. At least that had an original story and Hugh Grant hamming it up. Escapist fantasy can be fun, especially when it’s original or a new take on something old. But I really don’t give a shit about the latest rehash of Spiderman or Superman or The Hulk. IMO there’s not many interesting stories you can tell about superheroes fighting crime or aliens or whatever, especially when the studio is more into in licking the boots of the military-industrial complex than taking chances and getting weird with it. What I’m saying is they should let Wes Anderson direct an X-Men movie.
Yes! That’s perfect, at least it’s original.
I guess superhero movies just aren’t my thing. I did like the Joker movie with Joaquin Phoenix however.
I did like the Joker movie with Joaquin Phoenix however.
Same. I still gotta see the sequel.
Fun fact, that one is one of the better made ones, still just as formulaic as the others but at least some of the action and some of the jokes landed. A lot of them are significantly worse and even more formulaic!
There’s just something like, idk, “off” about these movies.
yes, the movie is definitely slop, but also for me that’s most movies made in the last 2 decades.Am I being a film snob??
two things can be true at the same timeSuperhero movies… good.
Movies with meta humans… good.
MCU slop… non-good.
I liked how in avengers end game they had to collect the dragon balls to wish their friends back to life.
I think Nicolas Cage put it pretty well when he recently called the MCU a “well-funded and glorified WWE”.
It’s the spectacle of watching your childhood superhero figures beating the bad guys (or each other) up on the big screen. People love that shit and will pay lots of money to see it. But don’t beat yourself up for not liking it, it’s definitely become a generic, formulaic product that Disney milks for cash and nothing else. Much like WWE. There is also a ton of Great Man Theory and American Exceptionalism in the MCU which I find insufferable at times.
That being said, there are some stand out MCU stuff that I do actually like because they break from the usual script. WandaVision and Agatha All Along come to mind.
civil war in particular I recall being very silly. the whole movie is trying to convince you that the characters are gonna start fighting each other like for realsies, only for it all to end at an abandoned airport where they punch each other and makes jokes and no one actually dies. then the overarching story kinda just moves on lmao
