This article draws all the wrong conclusions from the design of the survey itself. That’s the average date expense, for all single people, to include:
Rich people who don’t mind paying more for dinners out.
People who have been dating a long time, on their later dates with someone they’re already steadily dating and/or fucking.
Other expenses of a date, to include hair and makeup and other styling.
Digging into one of the surveys discussed in the article shows that the cost of a first date has climbed to $93.
$93 is more in line with what I’d expect. And yes, that price tag can price a lot of people out of bringing someone they don’t know well yet on a formal sit down date.
I went to look up the menu at the place where my wife and I had our first date, in an expensive city. If we ordered what we ordered that night, except with today’s prices, I think we would’ve spent about $30 on food, $50 on wine, and 30% on tax and tip for a total of about $105. We also split the tab. And that’s with someone who I had already met in person in a few places (friends of friends), had already established rapport over the phone, and already knew that we both loved the restaurant we were meeting at.
Obviously we need more cheap/free third places in the mix. And our society would benefit from better income/wealth equality. But while we live in this current situation, people should be generally be ramping up in closeness before spending real money on dates in places they wouldn’t have otherwise gone to. I couldn’t imagine spending real money before getting to know someone at least enough to know whether I like them and enjoy being around them.
The reality of the world is most people want to meet at a bar or do an activity, and that costs money. And men are expected to pay for the dating. Splitting the tab is now very rare. People are a lot more traditionally sexist than they were 10-20 years ago.
I date. Most women want to be wined and dined, or they want to do a trendy activity date. Even if I take a woman out to a museum and a glass of wine, it’s going to run me $100. Museum tickets are 30-40 dollars pp, and the wine is going to be 15-20 a glass.
Women I met used to offer to split, but that basically stopped happening post pandemic. Now they never offer to split. I’ve also noticed surge in women demanding traditional gender role dating both in person and on dating apps. Nobody is a feminist anymore like they were 10 years ago. They all want ‘masculine men’ and they want to be ‘feminine women’. A lot more women I meet now are now asking me if I am ‘actually straight/gay’ now too. No woman was asking me if I was gay 10 years ago. Gender expectations have changed and regressed.
Article is talking about the dating world, as it is, as of 2026. Not how it used to be, not how it ought to be.
i drive a hatchback that gets 40mpg. the women i meet want me to drive a gas guzzling truck, because it’s ‘masculine’.
the point you don’t understand is you can’t create reality around you by thinking happy thoughts.
reality exists whether you acknowledge it or not. buying a different car won’t change the basic economic facts of reality that govern the cost of things. i can choose not to ever eat out, but the prices of restaurants will not change because i eat there or not, they will continue to rise and many people will be happy and eager to pay them.
You’re completely missing their point friend. You think you HAVE to spend $100+ on a date and that’s “just reality”. You could go on a date for free if you really wanted to. But no, you HAVE to spend $100+ for a date you don’t have a choice you NEED to spend $100+ or nobody would ever agree to go on a date.
We’re all living in prisons of our own creation cuz we get an idea in our head and think that’s how it HAS to be.
nobody goes on free walking dates dude. at least proper adults. that is a construct your in your head.
last time i went on a ‘walking date’ i was a in my early 20s. yeah it was fine back then. 35 year old women dont’ wanna go for walks in the park, they want to go on a proper date.
I can see the guard has those gates firmly shut and chained. Hoping you can get out some day.
And fyi, I went on a 3 hour walk in a park with my now partner on our first date. Getting to know someone is the most important part of a date and you can do that for free, if you would only believe that you could. Maybe the people you are trying to date don’t want to do things like “go for a walk” or “get to know the other person”.
cool, was she a 40 year old woman in 2026 at that time?
No? Gee it’s almost as if you are projecting your past experiences into the present/future.
just like when grandpa used to talk about marrying grandma and popping out 3 kids the time he was 24. that is nice and all, but it’s not 1956 anymore. it’s 2026. nobody in their sane mind in 2026 thinks teenagers should be marrying at 17/19 and popping out 3 kids. the world has changed.
just like 20 years ago nobody had computers in their pockets and social media didn’t exist.
lecture me all you want grandpa about how it ‘should be’, it won’t change the fact it’s 2026 and this is how the world works today. i suppose you think a new house should only cost 5,000 dollars too? i got a newflash for you, homes now cost well over 500K and new ones are closer to a million dollars. clearly that’s my fault, the prison of my mind is what is making housing prices so high… if only i had a ‘positive attitude’ homes would be magically be 5000 dollars again! or my income would be 500K a year! clearly it’s a personal failing of mine, not at all the economy or market conditions over which no single person has any control…
I’m not going to pretend that I understand everything happening to today’s young daters, but what you’re describing isn’t true in my circles (which skew older and richer, but where the people going on dates are more likely to be divorced and/or have children from prior relationships, but where $200 on a weeknight dinner is not unusual or a financial stretch).
More importantly, I still stand by my description of how the article mangled the underlying studies. Dating can be expensive, but not everyone who goes on a $200 date in that survey is going on a first date with a stranger, and $93 is probably a better metric to follow to understand what is happening.
The rest of my comment is just a description of what I believe will both reduce the amount of money spent on first dates and increase the expected value of that date by deferring any decision to spend any money by only going on dates with people you already kinda know and already like. If you don’t believe that advice is practical for your current circumstances, I’m sorry to hear that, but I wonder if you can find another way to achieve similar effects.
i read books, i cook, my apartment is very clean. i have a pet cat. it makes them uncomfortable that I do these things.
women think this means you are not a real straight man. real straightmen can’t cook, they don’t eat, and they are gross and dirty and they have a dog.
literately have had more than one woman over to my place tell me it creeps her out that my place is too clean and i must have maid service, so i say no i just like to keep it clean, and they immediately get upset. probably because they hire a maid service and are slobs.
Surprised you’re running into so many gender-trads in Boston.
Then again, rent in Boston is crazy; maybe it’s not manliness, but that they are looking for breadwinners? Men with beacoup bucks don’t clean. You said you drive a practical car, not a status symbol. Dogs with pedigrees are expensive. Etc.
People in Boston are socially conservative. They are mostly center-right democrats, not progressives. They like Hillary Clinton, and they HATE Bernie Sanders. They hate poor people just as much as the republicans do, they just don’t hate them based on race or sex, they just hate them for not being rich and going to elite colleges.
I’m a progressive, and yeah most women here are turned off by that. They want a traditional guy who will pay their bills for them so they can quit working and travel with his money. And yes, they all have $10,000 dogs.
My dog is a $200 rescue dog. So was my cat. If i don’t clean my apartment would be disgusting from all the fur covering everything.
This article draws all the wrong conclusions from the design of the survey itself. That’s the average date expense, for all single people, to include:
Digging into one of the surveys discussed in the article shows that the cost of a first date has climbed to $93.
$93 is more in line with what I’d expect. And yes, that price tag can price a lot of people out of bringing someone they don’t know well yet on a formal sit down date.
I went to look up the menu at the place where my wife and I had our first date, in an expensive city. If we ordered what we ordered that night, except with today’s prices, I think we would’ve spent about $30 on food, $50 on wine, and 30% on tax and tip for a total of about $105. We also split the tab. And that’s with someone who I had already met in person in a few places (friends of friends), had already established rapport over the phone, and already knew that we both loved the restaurant we were meeting at.
Obviously we need more cheap/free third places in the mix. And our society would benefit from better income/wealth equality. But while we live in this current situation, people should be generally be ramping up in closeness before spending real money on dates in places they wouldn’t have otherwise gone to. I couldn’t imagine spending real money before getting to know someone at least enough to know whether I like them and enjoy being around them.
The world isn’t like that though.
The reality of the world is most people want to meet at a bar or do an activity, and that costs money. And men are expected to pay for the dating. Splitting the tab is now very rare. People are a lot more traditionally sexist than they were 10-20 years ago.
I date. Most women want to be wined and dined, or they want to do a trendy activity date. Even if I take a woman out to a museum and a glass of wine, it’s going to run me $100. Museum tickets are 30-40 dollars pp, and the wine is going to be 15-20 a glass.
Women I met used to offer to split, but that basically stopped happening post pandemic. Now they never offer to split. I’ve also noticed surge in women demanding traditional gender role dating both in person and on dating apps. Nobody is a feminist anymore like they were 10 years ago. They all want ‘masculine men’ and they want to be ‘feminine women’. A lot more women I meet now are now asking me if I am ‘actually straight/gay’ now too. No woman was asking me if I was gay 10 years ago. Gender expectations have changed and regressed.
Article is talking about the dating world, as it is, as of 2026. Not how it used to be, not how it ought to be.
You’re living in a prison of your own making. I hope you escape one day.
yeah, I’m also impinging that gas prices aren’t 5 bucks a gallon right now. it’s totally a figment of my imagination!
if i just think different, they were magically be 3 bucks again.
I think this guy drives a truck he struggles to afford…
i drive a hatchback that gets 40mpg. the women i meet want me to drive a gas guzzling truck, because it’s ‘masculine’.
the point you don’t understand is you can’t create reality around you by thinking happy thoughts.
reality exists whether you acknowledge it or not. buying a different car won’t change the basic economic facts of reality that govern the cost of things. i can choose not to ever eat out, but the prices of restaurants will not change because i eat there or not, they will continue to rise and many people will be happy and eager to pay them.
well, that’s me fucked,i drive an ecar I charge of my solar panels, i also have and prefer my ebike
but to be fair, I don’t need to tilt the front of my seat up on my bike to have it mash into my balls for ball maxing
https://www.foxnews.com/outkick-culture/ballmaxxing-electrifying-addictive-euphoric-transcendental-according-pursuing-bigger-balls
as theres noting more masculine and ball maxxing then making your own fuel :)
it’s fucked, but what isn’t in 2026? our government is fucked, our economy is fucked, dating is fucked.
You’re completely missing their point friend. You think you HAVE to spend $100+ on a date and that’s “just reality”. You could go on a date for free if you really wanted to. But no, you HAVE to spend $100+ for a date you don’t have a choice you NEED to spend $100+ or nobody would ever agree to go on a date.
We’re all living in prisons of our own creation cuz we get an idea in our head and think that’s how it HAS to be.
do you date?
nobody goes on free walking dates dude. at least proper adults. that is a construct your in your head.
last time i went on a ‘walking date’ i was a in my early 20s. yeah it was fine back then. 35 year old women dont’ wanna go for walks in the park, they want to go on a proper date.
I can see the guard has those gates firmly shut and chained. Hoping you can get out some day.
And fyi, I went on a 3 hour walk in a park with my now partner on our first date. Getting to know someone is the most important part of a date and you can do that for free, if you would only believe that you could. Maybe the people you are trying to date don’t want to do things like “go for a walk” or “get to know the other person”.
cool, was she a 40 year old woman in 2026 at that time?
No? Gee it’s almost as if you are projecting your past experiences into the present/future.
just like when grandpa used to talk about marrying grandma and popping out 3 kids the time he was 24. that is nice and all, but it’s not 1956 anymore. it’s 2026. nobody in their sane mind in 2026 thinks teenagers should be marrying at 17/19 and popping out 3 kids. the world has changed.
just like 20 years ago nobody had computers in their pockets and social media didn’t exist.
lecture me all you want grandpa about how it ‘should be’, it won’t change the fact it’s 2026 and this is how the world works today. i suppose you think a new house should only cost 5,000 dollars too? i got a newflash for you, homes now cost well over 500K and new ones are closer to a million dollars. clearly that’s my fault, the prison of my mind is what is making housing prices so high… if only i had a ‘positive attitude’ homes would be magically be 5000 dollars again! or my income would be 500K a year! clearly it’s a personal failing of mine, not at all the economy or market conditions over which no single person has any control…
Sounds like you’ve got a lot going on, hope you can find a way through it
I’m not going to pretend that I understand everything happening to today’s young daters, but what you’re describing isn’t true in my circles (which skew older and richer, but where the people going on dates are more likely to be divorced and/or have children from prior relationships, but where $200 on a weeknight dinner is not unusual or a financial stretch).
More importantly, I still stand by my description of how the article mangled the underlying studies. Dating can be expensive, but not everyone who goes on a $200 date in that survey is going on a first date with a stranger, and $93 is probably a better metric to follow to understand what is happening.
The rest of my comment is just a description of what I believe will both reduce the amount of money spent on first dates and increase the expected value of that date by deferring any decision to spend any money by only going on dates with people you already kinda know and already like. If you don’t believe that advice is practical for your current circumstances, I’m sorry to hear that, but I wonder if you can find another way to achieve similar effects.
i can’t change the world around me anymore than i can lower gas prices.
wot ? do they ask you if you’re vegan while you’re eating a steak ?
why are we dating and not fucking ? :)
indeed.
i read books, i cook, my apartment is very clean. i have a pet cat. it makes them uncomfortable that I do these things.
women think this means you are not a real straight man. real straightmen can’t cook, they don’t eat, and they are gross and dirty and they have a dog.
literately have had more than one woman over to my place tell me it creeps her out that my place is too clean and i must have maid service, so i say no i just like to keep it clean, and they immediately get upset. probably because they hire a maid service and are slobs.
Move, maybe? Do you live in a red state?
I live in Boston. I love it here. I own a home and it’s the best living here.
I’m not moving just to get laid more. Thanks.
Surprised you’re running into so many gender-trads in Boston.
Then again, rent in Boston is crazy; maybe it’s not manliness, but that they are looking for breadwinners? Men with beacoup bucks don’t clean. You said you drive a practical car, not a status symbol. Dogs with pedigrees are expensive. Etc.
People in Boston are socially conservative. They are mostly center-right democrats, not progressives. They like Hillary Clinton, and they HATE Bernie Sanders. They hate poor people just as much as the republicans do, they just don’t hate them based on race or sex, they just hate them for not being rich and going to elite colleges.
I’m a progressive, and yeah most women here are turned off by that. They want a traditional guy who will pay their bills for them so they can quit working and travel with his money. And yes, they all have $10,000 dogs.
My dog is a $200 rescue dog. So was my cat. If i don’t clean my apartment would be disgusting from all the fur covering everything.
You’re finding people who hate Bernie Sanders? Madness! Look for dates in Northampton I guess?
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