The first crewed voyage of Boeing’s Starliner was supposed to last around a week, but the high-stakes mission is still in limbo eight weeks after launch.
Their high-stakes mission was supposed to last about a week — but 56 days later, two NASA astronauts are still aboard the International Space Station, waiting as teams on the ground try to figure out how to bring them home safely in the Boeing spaceship they rode to orbit.
The beleaguered Starliner capsule has two problems: its propulsion system is leaking helium and five of its thrusters malfunctioned as it was docking with the space station. Mission managers were aware of the leaks before the vehicle lifted off but had said they were unlikely to affect the flight or the astronauts’ safety.
But they are totally not stranded.
Based on my knowledge gained by watching multiple space station related movies there are several emergency escape capsules up there, so they aren’t technically stranded until those don’t work also.
There is also at least one astronaut up there who smuggled a pack of chewing gum that can be used to plug the leaks once all other options are exhausted, but he hasn’t told anyone because he’ll get in trouble.
You jest, but a pinhole leak can be temporarily safely sealed on the ISS with a finger over it.
“The spaceship is at nearly 100 atmospheres of pressure!”
“Well how many atmospheres is it rated for?”
“Well, it’s a spaceship, so typically between zero and one”
Having also watched some classic sci-fi movies, I hope no one installed the ChatGPT module in the ISS computer system.
In unrelated news, the capsule has been renamed the SS Minnow.
*Just sit right back and you’ll hear a tale,
A tale of a space-bound flight,
That started from the launch pad,
And soared into the night.
The crew was a brave expedition,
Their mission to the ISS,
They docked at the space station,
For a stay they hoped would be a success.
But then a mishap came their way,
The systems went awry,
And now they’re stuck in orbit,
With no way to say goodbye.
So this is the crew of the ISS,
Stranded in the sky,
With floating and fixing their new routine,
They’ll adapt and try to get by.
They’ll orbit 'round the Earth each day,
In their floating, cosmic home,
With teamwork and resilience,
They’ll make it through alone.*
PS, I didn’t write this.
stranded technically comes from the germanic word, strand, which means beach. They’re nowhere close to sand!
No no no, they chose to be on the deserted island. Definitely not stranded