JD Vance is a sofa-sexual and enjoys a smooth ride. When he feels the soft, inviting advances of a seductive sofa working up his Sectional Feelings, he wraps it up with a Grandma Brand© Plastic Couch Cover. It cleans up in a jiffy and his guests never suspect a thing!

Anyone want some more ranch dip? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

I made this back in October but didn’t do anything with it. Apparently it’s more relevant than I realized, and this seems like a good place to put it.

But he was so generous with the paper towels!!

The best combo!

Vampira*

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Now’s your chance!

Savers is the same as Value Village and it’s a for-profit company that exists in three different countries. They’re not much better than Goodwill, if at all.

…how do you measure a year in Trump’s life?

In golf games? In rubles? In lawsuits? In twitter postings?

In rallies, incitement… in terror, in strife?

Cult of personality?

What’s the Thai flag doing in the background?

Then shot himself in the foot handing it over.

“The radical left did it!!”

Ew, a stranger appearing uninvited in my house?

No, they can teleport to the driveway like a normal person, thankyouverymuch.

Congrats! When’s the wedding?

It’s not surprising that Starbucks joined but I didn’t know about REI. What the hell, REI!

And when you’re a MAGA, he lets you do it! You can do anything!

Now do Ticketmaster

He’s been at the Milk Plus again. Dammit Korova Milk Bar, stop sharpening him up for the old Ultra Violence!

He is definitely losing supporters. I know a postal carrier in one of the worst red states and after both recent debates she’s been seeing longstanding trump flags and bumper stickers disappear from houses on her route.

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