Lemmygrad is a small community, which is also more friendlier and the chance that an member will bully you is slim. The biggest reason why I am here is simple the fact, that I am not called a vatnik, putler, mongolic horde or an orc. This reminds me how liberals are now blaming other ethnicities in the US, that Trump won.

When the war started in Ukraine I often read things on Reddit, which denied that I am a human at all. Like, I am an orc no matter what my position regarding the war is. My ethnicity is the fault itself. I never mentioned where I was born, but reading such things simply hurts. But it is totally contrary on Lemmygrad. Of course it is a big plus, that it is ml (Also I never saw that someone was banned, only because the person was an anarchist - only reactionaries will send away). This combination makes it a great place and it doesnt hurt your mental health.

I abandoned every last bit of corporate social media about two years ago. The master’s tools will never dismantle the master’s house. Their algorithms attenuate our agitations.

american culture is mostly a cesspool

> Corporate social media is so toxic and disheartening. I am going to log on to Lemmygrad.
> Top five posts are twitter and youtube comment screenshots

It’s definitely a good idea. The best thing about here is that we can talk with sane people, even if just a bit.

Overall I only use corporate social media for niche interests that aren’t big enough on lemmy yet. Politics is just a waste of time. Even if you convince someone to stop being a complete ghoul, the algorithms will make sure they return to their earlier opinions.

Corporate social media is bad for your health. Not only have I been mentally healthier since I stopped using them, I’ve also been a better, kinder, more patient person to others and to myself.

I’m skeptical of how much positive work can be done on corporate platforms. In the past, I have been informed by radical tweets, etc. But these themselves have not radicalised me—just gave me ammunition and incensed me.

Arguing directly, one-to-one with a person is not going to change their mind. Online or offline. To reach people, you need to persuade them, which requires them to be in a receptive state of mind. That’s not possible when people feel attacked and get defensive. You can overcome people’s defenses. But it takes work and requires an environment in which they’re willing to lower their guard. These corporate platforms are instead designed to keep you arguing, antagonistically, with limited possibility of reconciliation.

On corporate online platforms, you are also contesting with the following:

• you aren’t friends with or close to your interlocutors, rarely will you even have a relationship beyond a few posts
• if you are talking to people you have existing relationships with, the incentives are perverse because strangers are able to disrupt things
• the people you argue with have no motive or even the opportunity to come back to you and build a relationship
• the format of online communication is determined – and re-determined at a whim – by the owners; and they pay more to psychologists and spooks to craft a certain discourse than you will ever earn in your lifetime
• that format is actively hostile to creating lasting, meaningful relationships, of the sort that people feel so invested that they are willing to change to fit in
• written communication online can involve:
• • language differences
• • cultural differences
• • ‘playing to the crowd’ mentality (i.e. simply assuming/imagining that onlookers who agree with you are watching and supporting you, making it hard for people to back down)
• • lack of ‘tone’, body language, expressions, etc, to soften the message

Many of these problems are surmountable. I think we do a good job of things on Lemmygrad, for example. But the environment here has been carefully constructed to facilitate good faith conversation. The opposite is true of Facebook, Twitter, etc.

There are also minor exceptions to the above problems with the big platforms and some methods of escaping the traps. One of which is organising with others. In general, working alone, you’re starting with too many disadvantages. The odds are stacked against you.

I know why you’re disenchanted because I’ve been there before. Give yourself a break. Go back in a month’s time to see how you feel. Give yourself another break, etc. Then decide whether you want to keep using those services, with some fresh perspective.