maybe it happened

  • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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    21 days ago

    peak femcel behavior. The person clearly put in research and communicated despite using “the wrong tool”. That’s presumably an older person as well. But yeah eat junk at food and “read books” when we all know it’s just doomcrolling into femcel echo chambers

    • DrSoap@lemmy.world
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      21 days ago

      Using AI to choose a date venue is low effort. It is not “research” and the “wrong tool.”

      To spell it out, dating is about getting to know a potential partner and to let that partner get to know you. When I choose a date, I share a part of myself, a restaurant I love, a movie special to me or a cozy coffee of conversation.

      To be in an art class together, a museum and coffee would have most likely been the perfect first date where the asker shows the askee some of their favorite works.

      To outsource the emotional labor of a relationship, especially so early on where everything is exciting and new is not a good sign, male or female. Dr. Moose, something is wrong with you that you reacted this strongly to a quippy little post.

      • khaleer@sopuli.xyz
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        21 days ago

        Dr Moose is probably the man from mentioned art-class, deducing from his reaction 🤤

          • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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            21 days ago

            I have no issue with that in fact I’m very much a feminist but just like there are incels on the toxic manosphere there are incels on the toxic “man bad because small mistake, better just eat snack and entertain yourself” femisphere. It’s just these cringe losers being vocal I have issue with.

      • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        oh please. How is it any different from scrolling through Google Maps or whatever other research tool? Also you assume that person in question has no struggles of their own - what if they’re autistic or in general very poor at planning and need assistance? Clearly they didn’t have a malicious intent even from the accusers pov and clearly tried.

        To outsource the emotional labor of a relationship

        emotional labor? this is first date, they hardly know each other. They are clearly older people too so this is not a highschool romance. Absurd.

        Dr. Moose, something is wrong with you

        sorry for calling out lunacy but all it takes for rational people to say nothing and allow these extremist lunatics to take over culture. And for the record I like cancel culture, I like social justice, I like ethics and responsibility but this is nothing of the like - this is just incels.

        • Echo Dot@feddit.uk
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          21 days ago

          If I’m asking somebody out on a date I’ve got at least a vague idea of what that date would look like.

          • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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            21 days ago

            Great me too. I can also reach the top shelf, but that doesn’t give me the permission to shit on short people. Some people have social and planning difficulties and we shouldn’t shun and shame them but educate, encourage and even accommodate them especially when it was clearly a good faith attempt.

            • RobotsLeftHand@lemmy.world
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              21 days ago

              Your version of accommodation is removing the human element in the one thing that should be most human. The fact you cant see the difference between asking AI and using google maps tells me you are struggling with this concept. That you think first dates dont carry emotional weight sorta seals it.

              • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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                21 days ago

                Your version of accommodation is removing the human element in the one thing

                what are you even on about? how is querying “date places” in chatgpt any different from typing in “date places” in google maps? just because you get text output instead of a visual one? it’s just a computer my dude.

        • DrSoap@lemmy.world
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          21 days ago

          Oh please. Here you go assuming that a widow of 12 years has no struggles of her own. Why are you so fired up? She found ultimate love, lost it. Tried to venture out and date again and she didn’t like it. She returns to her peaceful life.

          Why do you need her to date her AI dependent classmate so badly?

    • Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      21 days ago

      Just asking a chat bot and then going with its suggestion is as much “research” as stopping a random kid on the street and asking them for a suggestion and then just trusting it at face value and going with it.

      Sure, doing that can be a starting point for research (by actually checking that suggestion out, maybe asking for more suggestions from other sources and checking those out), but by itself it’s literally the lowest effort possible thing one can do to obtain an option.

      There’s being cheap in a money sense and there’s also being cheap in an effort sense, at that guy was definitelly putting the minimum effort possible into coming up with evening plans.

      Ultimatelly it boils down to whether you’re into women which expect more from a guy on a date than minimum effort or prefer the airhead or desperate kind who will take pretty much anything.

      This woman being 12 years a widow is probably in her late 30, early 40s, so way more likelly to be the former type than the latter as most people get more complex and gain increased expectancies with age and, especially, experience.

      Mind you, those are perfectly valid preferences either way, but they’re entirelly on YOU - your preference - not on women in general. Stick to the kind you like and if you’re having problems finding those, well, that’s a you problem.

      • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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        21 days ago

        This woman being 12 years a widow is probably in her late 30, early 40

        she’s nearing 60 based on her twitter profile. If you ever seen 60 year olds date you’d know that this guy did a very good job: planned a date and communicated clearly with honesty, even using technology albeit somewhat ignorantly. This lady is clearly an incel - instead of appreciating the effort or being polite she posts online to shame the person for using a tool they don’t like on a literal nazi platform she pays money to. Let’s be very clear - there is no moral confusion here.

        • Aceticon@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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          21 days ago

          You just made my point further.

          The guy was indeed honest, which made clear to her how much effort he was willing to put on finding a second date for her: not much.

          She’s clearly not into guys whose maximum effort to find a nice place for a second date with her is “ask chatbot”.

          Seems to me that “not interested in guys who put very little effort in finding the right place for a date” is a pretty fair posture to have.

          instead of appreciating the effort

          What effort? It literally took you more effort to type your post than it wold take the guy to ask ChatGPT and then send her a message.

          being polite she posts online to shame the person for using a tool

          I would totally agree with you on this if she had actually shamed him. She didn’t - he’s not named or referenced in her post, she didn’t even insult guys that do that (unlike you, who called her “femcel” for it). She pretty much just said “some guy did this for a date and I didn’t like it”. Well, now people who follow here on Twitter know she doesn’t like that stuff. That’s all her, not some random guy nobody has any idea who he is.

          What’s interesting here is how you’re actually raging at these specific preferences of this woman. I mean, if a woman didn’t like blond dudes or guys who came to a date on a bicycle, would you also rage about her and call her some insulting names?

          You seem to have weird problems with some women having specific preferences in the kind of person they’ll date - What’s your problem? You do you, they do they - they’re not imposing anything on you but you sure all hell seem to want women in general to either comply with your views or shut up if otherwise.

          • Dr. Moose@lemmy.world
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            21 days ago

            What effort? It literally took you more effort to type your post than it wold take the guy to ask ChatGPT and then send her a message.

            Honestly I don’t think this is going discussion anywhere if you think this is “no effort” for a 60 year old planning a date. So have a good day I guess.