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magus@l.tta.wtf to News@lemmy.worldEnglish · 5 days ago

At Long Last, InfoWars Is Ours

theonion.com

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At Long Last, InfoWars Is Ours

theonion.com

magus@l.tta.wtf to News@lemmy.worldEnglish · 5 days ago
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  • cross-posted to:
  • [email protected]
  • [email protected]
Let me tell you a story. When I was a child, I suffered from night terrors. It was always the same dream: I could hear my family and neighbors wailing in the street outside as they were pursued and then destroyed by a nameless malevolent force, something neither I nor anyone else could control, a […]

They don’t have the dot-com name yet, but you can preview what’s coming at https://theonion.info/

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  • TheTechnician27@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    The InfoWars of old was only the prototype for the hell I know we can build together: A digital platform where, every day, visitors sacrifice themselves at altars of delusion and misery, their minds fully disintegrating on contact.

    It’s magnificent.

    • BrianTheeBiscuiteer@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      I’m a bit worried this will turn into qAnon ×10 but just as many people will think it’s dead serious.

      • youcantreadthis@quokk.au
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        5 days ago

        Yes but it will be actually funny this time.

        • anomnom@sh.itjust.works
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          5 days ago

          Birds aren’t really set as good an example as I’ve seen and it still got out of hand.

          I still can imagine the Pastafarians eventually losing the parody and having fundamentalists someday too.

          • youcantreadthis@quokk.au
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            4 days ago

            Will it be funny?

            • anomnom@sh.itjust.works
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              4 days ago

              Some of what any fundamentalists do will always be funny, but usually only to outsiders

              • youcantreadthis@quokk.au
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                4 days ago

                Yeah but mostly funny.

  • CircaV@lemmy.ca
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    5 days ago

    Best. News. And Tim Heidecker at the creative helm too!! It’s gonna be so wack!!

  • hitstun@feddit.online
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    5 days ago

    an InfoWars parody ad advertising the secret of floating, showing a man floating in the air above the Windows XP Bliss wallpaper or something

    Aw man, Learn to Float is already sold out!

    • CircaV@lemmy.ca
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      5 days ago

      Damn! I wanted to learn the ancient secrets of floating!!

      • OpenStars@piefed.social
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        5 days ago

        It’s easy, you just fall but right before you hit the ground, you distract yourself and… miss.

        img

  • magus@l.tta.wtfOP
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    5 days ago

    Covered slightly more seriously by the NYT and probably others: https://www.nytimes.com/2026/04/20/business/infowars-alex-jones-the-onion.html

    • TachyonTele@piefed.social
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      5 days ago

      You have been blocked from The New York Times because we suspect that you’re a robot.

      Dammit, foiled agian1

      • tal@lemmy.today
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        5 days ago

        I kind of regret that there’s no /r/TotallyNotRobots analog on the Threadiverse, but I suppose that there might not be enough people who want to do casual creative writing to keep it active. [email protected] seems to be getting limited traffic.

    • justOnePersistentKbinPlease@fedia.io
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      5 days ago

      81k a month?

      Fucking hell Im in the wrong field if a stack of yelly bullshit lies is worth that.

    • ZoteTheMighty@lemmy.zip
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      5 days ago

      What would be the point of that?

  • pelespirit@sh.itjust.works
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    Fucking YESSSSSSZZZZZZZ!!! Now we can all claim Info Wars as our god and savior.

    Edit: I hope it goes through.

    The licensing deal has been agreed to by The Onion and the court-appointed administrator. But it is not effective until Judge Guerra Gamble approves it, and Mr. Jones could appeal any ruling. That means the fate of Infowars remains in limbo until the court rules, probably sometime in the next two weeks. Mr. Jones continues to operate Infowars.com and host its weekday program, “The Alex Jones Show.”

    The Onion plans to turn Infowars into a comedy site with satirical echoes of the fringe conspiracy theories that Mr. Jones is known for. Tim Heidecker, one of the comedians behind “Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job!” on Cartoon Network’s Adult Swim, has been hired to serve as “creative director of Infowars.” He said he initially planned to parody Mr. Jones’s “whole modus operandi.”

    • Lost_My_Mind@lemmy.world
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      What if…they hired Alex Jones, to play a character named Jones Alex, who does his whole show naked, except for a bowtie?

      All the other stuff Tim had planned for the new show, Jones Alex can say. Same show, just evrn more absurd

      • youcantreadthis@quokk.au
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        5 days ago

        Thats what ai is for.

  • nondescripthandle@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    5 days ago

    Cant wait to put rainbow infowars stickers on all the stop signs with the old stickers on them, nothing like a little maintenance and upkeep

  • TachyonTele@piefed.social
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    I’ve seen this headline five times during the whole process. I’ll believe it when it happens.

    • CmdrShepard49@sh.itjust.works
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      The fact that this headline came without 500 propaganda articles coming to Jones defense leads me to believe that he’s burned all his bridges and nobody is there to rescue him this time.

    • stickyprimer@lemmy.world
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      Infowars.com has a big banner up proclaiming: “The Onion Lies To Internet Again, Falsely Claims Control Over Infowars”

      I’ll join in the fist-pumping when that’s gone.

      • TachyonTele@piefed.social
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        3 days ago

        Yeah i just looked, jones definitely still has it.

  • davidgro@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    It’s unfortunate that it’s not final yet, but this is still awesome

  • Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works
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    4 days ago

    Ended, the info wars have.

  • Cad@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Can’t wait for the next Knowledge Fight episode to drop!

    • Zombiepirate@lemmy.world
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      It’s kind of amazing how this is all coming together at the same time for Alex: getting his life’s “work” bought out from under him while Trump cuts him out of the alt-rot movement altogether. I’m curious how it’s all going to go.

    • NotASharkInAManSuit@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      They’re going to be so happy.

  • Gates9@sh.itjust.works
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    5 days ago

    Last I heard, Onion CEO Ben Collins was dating Kat Abughazaleh.

    • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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      5 days ago

      No no no. What you heard was “They’re sleeping together” and that’s only because they both have narcolepsy.

  • TimboSlice@discuss.online
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    4 days ago

    Tim Heidecker in charge? Awesome!

  • dis_honestfamiliar@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    Before reading the article, I was going to say make it the same but with different tone. Same lies same everything as to show people it remains the same except for the tone. But nah, this new vision sounds interesting.

  • aramis87@fedia.io
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    5 days ago

    Congratulations, The Onion!!!

  • UnderpantsWeevil@lemmy.world
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    5 days ago

    This is pretty cool.

    Now, is there any way they can hand the day-to-day operations off to Julian Assange?

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