[CW: SA, Carnism, Transphobia]
When we were together, my ex raised an excellent point where she spoke on a reason, besides the obvious incompatible ethics, as to why she refuses to date non-vegans.
This reason is that, since non-vegans not only support animals being violated on a daily basis, but they also make outlandish jusfications for it, she cannot wholeheartedly trust that non-vegans will have the ability to understand, respect, and value consent.
That stood out to me because I definitely relate to that particular angle, especially since both of us are survivors of SA, but there is another angle that I apply this kind of thinking to: being anti-oppression.
I can speak on this from experience as well. Me and my ex encountered a carnist “leftist” who exploited the shit out of the “privilege” argument, i.e., she accused vegans of being “privileged” people who “aggressively” promote animal liberation activism without caring about the marginalized. This woman, in particular, is a survivor of SA, and she was especially frustrated that my ex called the forceful breeding of non-human animals into existence exactly what it is…
This woman proceeded to gloss over the fact that my ex herself is a survivor of SA, and she called my ex inconsiderate for using the term “animal slavery” because my ex is white. However, when I, as a black person, weigh in and state that I agree with calling such exploitation “animal slavery,” I got accused of being a “token,” a “pawn,” and a “simp for white supremacy.” Mind you, this carnist “leftist” woman who was lashing out at us also happens to be white. She will exploit identity politics but only if it works for enabling her anti-vegan rubbish.
Here’s what really got me, though. Since every single “argument” against veganism that she could offer hinges on accusing vegans of being hyperprivileged so that she could paint us as reactionary, it seemed like she was met with a dilemma when it came to how to abuse this line of thinking against me. It’s not like she has much of a leg to stand on for accusing a highly intersectional individual like myself of using vegan advocacy as an abuse of privilege, right? I’m black, transfeminine, non-binary, pansexual, neurodivergent, poor as fuck, and I was disowned by my family of devout Catholic immigrants from an anti-LGBT country.
So what does she do instead? She misgenders me. She takes a clip of me giving my agreement with my ex’s phrasing on what non-human animals go through sexually, omitting tons of important context, and she calls me, a transfeminine victim of SA, “a male vegan trivializing victims of SA.” This conversation was through voice, and my voice isn’t feminine, but even with that in mind, she herself knew that I’m transfeminine. What did she proceed to do when I pointed out the misgendering? She doubled down on her transphobia by falling back on the “sex/gender” distinction by saying “It’s not misgendering because I called you a male and not a man,” and she says that, by being a “male,” I have “male privilege because all males have male privilege.”
This experience completely fucking warped how seriously I can expect non-vegans to be opposed to oppression and bigotry. Even before this, I already had a shit ton of skepticism when it comes to believing that the leftists I interact with are genuine in what they preach, especially when they are white, cishet, male, neurotypical, wealthy, etc., but I’m adding another descriptor to this bunch: carnist.
In essence, you cannot, with authenticity, claim to be anti-oppression if you support it on your plate daily, and these people proved to me that if it lessens their feelings of guilt, it will bleed into them supporting certain kinds of discrimination against humans as well. Most frightening of all, I’m quite uncomfortable because, on some occasions, I have already seen this “vegans are privileged, inconsiderate white male bigots” kind of rhetoric from carnists on Hexbear too!
She admitted to being a college student and that her parents pay for all of her expenses to go to school. The fact that she is a cracKKKer LARPing as a leftist and pretending to oppose oppression is the cherry on top. Very much ironic for her to literally misgender me just to try to paint me as some kind of privileged identity relative to her. It shows how out-of-touch whites and cissies can be with what trans people of color typically endure.
Yeah it’s fucking rough. I oscillate around how to manage people like this. They can be nucleation points for very toxic dynamics in leftist spaces that drive people away. Like conflict resolution is already incredible hard and then you have these people who are whatever the exact opposite of having those skills are. But it is incredibly hard to construct reasons to kick them out of spaces. I agree it’s hard to even define them as a leftist because their only vaguely left idea is an incredibly elaborate privilege hierarchy theory they’ve developed.