Wow that’s so true. I am cis and there is no way such a thought would cross my mind, it didn’t even when I had a years long identity crisis because I didn’t know yet how to connect with myself. And everyone I know about, regardless gender, has to contemplate for nanoseconds before a confident “no”. Downplaying the significance of when someone feels differently, even if it’s “light” or “neutral”, is ignorant and cruel. And I don’t even mean ignorant of a small minority, thinking about your own experience is sufficient to get the point.
It’s actually really validating for you to say that, thank you! For so long I thought that every guy was secretly disappointed that they hadn’t been born a girl
I think part of why trans folks end up with this misconception is that there are a bunch of cishet guys who’d happily be a girl for a day. But it’s usually for sexual reasons only (I get to touch boobs!) and they definitely want to change back at the end. Whereas I was always fine with the concept of “being changed into a girl indefinitely” but it was usually as a thing outside my control, so I didn’t have to consider wanting it.
I’m a woman but I’ve had this discussion with many guys and it’s honestly a universal experience. I’ve discussed it so much because as soon as you think about for a second you realize it it’s not a very intuitive and straightforward fact, it’s honestly a wonder so many people are so confident about the gender they were born with.
Can’t imagine how difficult your journey must be, sending you sincere warm wishes.
Oh absolutely, how lonely I felt having undiagnosed ADHD for 30+ years. I never knew why I felt so misunderstood until I realized what was making me different from everyone else. The past 4 years post diagnosis has been revelation after revelation as I recontextualize my entire life.
Wow that’s so true. I am cis and there is no way such a thought would cross my mind, it didn’t even when I had a years long identity crisis because I didn’t know yet how to connect with myself. And everyone I know about, regardless gender, has to contemplate for nanoseconds before a confident “no”. Downplaying the significance of when someone feels differently, even if it’s “light” or “neutral”, is ignorant and cruel. And I don’t even mean ignorant of a small minority, thinking about your own experience is sufficient to get the point.
It’s actually really validating for you to say that, thank you! For so long I thought that every guy was secretly disappointed that they hadn’t been born a girl
I think part of why trans folks end up with this misconception is that there are a bunch of cishet guys who’d happily be a girl for a day. But it’s usually for sexual reasons only (I get to touch boobs!) and they definitely want to change back at the end. Whereas I was always fine with the concept of “being changed into a girl indefinitely” but it was usually as a thing outside my control, so I didn’t have to consider wanting it.
I’m a woman but I’ve had this discussion with many guys and it’s honestly a universal experience. I’ve discussed it so much because as soon as you think about for a second you realize it it’s not a very intuitive and straightforward fact, it’s honestly a wonder so many people are so confident about the gender they were born with.
Can’t imagine how difficult your journey must be, sending you sincere warm wishes.
Oh absolutely, how lonely I felt having undiagnosed ADHD for 30+ years. I never knew why I felt so misunderstood until I realized what was making me different from everyone else. The past 4 years post diagnosis has been revelation after revelation as I recontextualize my entire life.
I wouldn’t wish that feeling on anyone.