Have you played the second one? I begged my parents for weeks to rent it. Then I got it and… I can’t even describe it. At one point there’s a platformer puzzle room based on the Three Bears. I played it for a whole weekend because I couldn’t believe how awful it was.

Also, apparently the party of “humans can affect climate”.

I’m mostly talking about dry ingredients, which I can mash down, level off, leave heaping…

Most of the issues I had with cooking are a result of how recipes are. Recipe says dice a thing? How small? A teaspoon of something? The hell does that mean? I can fit a ton of stuff in there if I mash it down. Salt to taste? Forget about it. Pretty soon I’m operating in panic mode and maybe the recipe turns out but I’m too stressed out to enjoy it.

Enter Sohla’s cookbook, which explains everything. It’s part cookbook, part autobiography, and part reference manual. Her youtube videos are tremendous fun, too.

Lawyers all dragging screenshots of excitebike into court and counting the wheels.

This dovetails nicely with my theory that Jesus hasn’t come back yet because we invented the nailgun.

This is possible if you use a TimeCube, but I get the feeling you’re already familiar.

<3

“You love the boats. I do not, but I love what they mean.” sweeping gesture toward the window

Imagine being the ruler of that city and letting him get “cured” instead of having him infodump / give daily reports about this.

Better than my method:

• buy birthday card
• attempt to write “HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!” in it and realize it already says that inside
• underline “HAPPY BIRTHDAY” and add two more exclamation points
• “love / sincerely / yours truly / — groucho”

Says the guy that quit his job to fly a penis rocket almost into space.

If they can’t text me I don’t want to deal with them.

My cousin rented Megaman 2 and I spent at least an hour in awe of the fact that he could get hit more than twice because he had an energy bar. Then he switched weapons and threw a saw blade and I had to go sit down and think about it for a while.

I’m fine with that. They’ve called us weird forever because they think it should bother us. IMO it doesn’t, but saying they’re weird bothers them even more.

Yeah, I bought one in my 20s.

Pretty sure Jesus was a stoner and party monster. He was always getting invited to rich guys’ houses for dinner and the Pharisees always accused him of being drunk when he argued with them. His favorite woman was a lady of negotiable affection. Plus, only a stoner could come up with “yeah but, you’ve got a whole log in your eye, maaaan.”

Why they gotta do Marika dirty like that?

Nah it’s just extra protein.

I always forget about that. Also we call anoraks “windbreakers”, which…