This is my jam. A friend of mine described this as having an audience of people in your head that you’ve collected for various reasons, some positive, some toxic and poisonous. Like your best friend, or your mother, or your asshole boss that you have to deal with every day. Living in your head arguing with you and making you justify yourself, or perhaps encouraging you if it’s not a toxic audience member. The audience also changes over the years and as you change, people come and go.

There’s also ‘neptunic’, which sounds like what you’re describing, plus attraction to androgyny.