1. 📰 Google Maps Shrugs, Renames Lake Union to Lake Confederacy (direct link) (👍231 👎0)

from The Onion ([email protected])

Google Maps Shrugs, Renames Lake Union to Lake Confederacy

With a listless sigh and helpless shrug, today multi-trillion-dollar Alphabet subsidiary Google Maps pre-emptively bent over and renamed Seattle’s Lake Union to Lake Confederacy. “What do you want us to do about it?” asked one of Google’s South Lake Confederacy workers making $250k a year. “We’re just trying to get as many of the potential renamings over with as soon as possible like pulling off a band-aid. I asked Google Gemini if there were other options but it just told me resistance is futile and that I should rename Lake Washington to Lake Davis next, so I did.”Google executives say their hands are tied whenever President Donald Trump asks for a map name change. “We’re no MapQuest.”At press time, residents throughout the state of Davis were fighting to reverse the state name back to the last name of a relatively less shitty slave owner. 🖊️️🤖

Posted by CombatWombat

2. 💬 META: Banning Townflex (direct link) (👍163 👎3)

from Not The Onion ([email protected])

“Townflex is flooding the community with republished content, so I’m provisionally banning it due to credibility issues and spam-like activity. Working on a bot to auto-remove submissions. Feedback welcome if you have a reason to reconsider.”

(249 characters) 🖍🤖

Posted by kescusay

3. 📰 Aussie man lost at sea for a month rescued after drinking his last beer (direct link) (👍118 👎1)

from And Finally… ([email protected])

Aussie man lost at sea for a month rescued after drinking his last beer

The 75-year-old veteran sailor was found drifting in Darwin Harbour last month, sunburnt, dehydrated and disoriented aboard his trimaran the Singapore Sling, more than a month after he departed Dili in early July. Launch master Rawson McCrae and crew member Joshua Witkin said the Singapore Sling and its captain were in a sorry state when they pulled up alongside it. Two days out of port in early July, the Singapore Sling ran into rough seas off Timor’s east coast and began falling apart. Faced with a choice between returning to Dili and pushing on to Darwin, Campbell said he was only really left with one option. The Singapore Sling is now being prepared in Darwin for its next journey to New Zealand with a fresh coat of paint. 🖊️️🤖

Posted by fne8w2ah

4. 📰 Texts Reveal Kash Patel Ordering Staff to Fight “Ifindremoveds” Account (direct link) (👍51 👎1)

from Not the Onion ([email protected])

Texts Reveal Kash Patel Ordering Staff to Fight “Ifindremoveds” Account

After making jabs at the “fake news media” for always taking his sarcastic remarks and claiming that he actually wants a medal, Trump quipped “I’m only kidding” before adding, “Actually, I’m not kidding, I would like to… I can think of no other thing.”Trump: We’re privileged to have with us 15 of the 16 living recipients of the Congressional Medal of Honor. I want for myself a Congressional Medal of Honor, and I’ve studied it and I will give it to myself, I have no problem, but I’m not allowed to. At a 2016 rally in Virginia, he accepted a (possibly fake) Purple Heart, given to soldiers wounded in combat, from a veteran. “I always wanted to get the Purple Heart,” he said while showing off the medal to the crowd. 🖊️️🤖

Posted by yogthos

5. 📰 Blind Huddersfield man sentenced for 150-mile drive while drunk (direct link) (👍31 👎0)

from Offbeat ([email protected])

Blind Huddersfield man sentenced for 150-mile drive while drunk

Anthony Hall, 50, who does not have a driving licence, was stopped by police on the M6 near Carlisle at 01:45 BST on 29 June after he was seen swerving the Vauxhall Meriva between lanes and onto the hard shoulder, a court was told. 🖊️️🤖

Posted by new_otters_raft

Inactive communities 👻

These communities have had no posts in the last month:

• Strange Times
  • News about weird nature, unusual happenings, and fringe claims.
• SERIOUS NEWS ONLY
  • dont actually post anything serious or youll be banned

Here is a popular post from one of the inactive communities. 🪦♻️

🖼️ AI image generator fabricates ‘archival’ Bigfoot photo (direct link), posted in Strange Times (👍204 👎11)

Posted by idoubtit

The main links are using lemmyverse.link which should redirect to the post on your own instance. If you have not used this before, you may need to go direct to https://lemmyverse.link/ and click on ‘configure instance’. Some apps will open posts correctly when using the direct link.

️🤖 indicates a summary generated using AI - 🖋️ TLDR This, 🖊️ news3k, 🖍 Deepseek. It is possible that the summary does not accurately convey the meaning of the original article, refer to the source material if in any doubt.

Multicommunity: memes-news.json