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jbk@discuss.tchncs.de to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 4 days ago

Family Spends Relaxing Weekend Destroying Outdoors

theonion.com

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Family Spends Relaxing Weekend Destroying Outdoors

theonion.com

jbk@discuss.tchncs.de to The Onion@midwest.socialEnglish · 4 days ago
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ATLANTA—Feeling refreshed after three days of camping in Georgia’s Oconee National Forest, members of the Prendergast family confirmed Monday they had spent a relaxing weekend destroying the great outdoors. “It’s nice every now and then to escape from the city, get outside, and take some time to really trash nature,” said father of two Dan Prendergast, 49, remarking that the highlight of the trip was a morning hike during which his family was able to toss away their juice bottles, granola bar wrappers, and Ziploc sandwich bags at the summit of Burgess Mountain and along the banks of the Ocmulgee River. “Nothing beats being out in the country and littering with the whole family. It’s easy, too: We just pack up a couple disposable styrofoam coolers with food and drinks, load up the Chevy Suburban, and then drive out into the woods to pollute all that Mother Nature has to offer.” While the Prendergasts all agreed the weekend trip was fun, they told reporters that by Sunday, they were ready to get back to damaging the environment from the comfort of their own 5,000-square-foot air-conditioned home.
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  • owenfromcanada@lemmy.ca
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    4 days ago

    “The father plans to follow up next weekend with several days shooting animals for his own amusement.”

  • Jo Miran@lemmy.ml
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    4 days ago

    I am a Wyoming resident. It is impossible for me to accurately describe how bad it gets around this time.

    • Trapped In America@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 days ago

      Sounds like it’s time to bring back the tradition of tying dipshits to trees for 3-4 days. They’ll get the message.

  • Flax@feddit.uk
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    4 days ago

    GO BACK INSIDE AND PLAY WITH YOUR PHONES!!!

  • ToastedRavioli@midwest.social
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    4 days ago

    True blue “stewards of the environment”

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