they should do it without vulgar insults or baseless slander.

Fair enough.

Look, that’s how Lemmy works, because “Lemmy” doesn’t realy exist, it’s just software. There’s no need for a ban appeal or anything, because if you got banned, they don’t want you, ever. Some instances do make their admin’s contacts public, such as Lemmygrad’s, so you could try messaging them on Matrix or something… Though I would not keep my hopes up. You could always make a new account, I think. To check details, by the way, you just go to the bottom of the page and click Modlog and then input the username you want to check. Here is a direct link to checking @[email protected]’s modlog.

You can do this for any user on any instance, but certain instances don’t federate modlogs well with each other, so it’s best to check each instance’s modlog for instance-specific information.

Each instance has its culture and expectations. There’s instances out there for you, I’m sure! Best of luck! And sorry you had such… Negative… first experiences.